Contemplation: Log 2

I just may be the black Drew Carey...

Contemplation: Log 1

For a long time, one of my secret desires has been to go back to relive my entire life of 20 years, so that I can use what I know now so I want make any mistakes. Today, I began thinking, do I really have the courage to do go back. If really given the opportunity to go back, would I really have the constitution to follow the same path I have followed up until now, instead of another? I don't know. Someone once said that it takes courage to start over again at square one. In my case, I am not so sure... but something deep inside makes me want to know who I would be if I chose to change in such a way.

The end of the Beginning... the continuation of the CRAP!

I never really liked the way my life looked when I was in high school. Now that I am in college, I like it even less. It seems to me that my life is going nowhere fast, the only difference now is that I have the grades to prove it. I am not even going to bother to write the crap that I might have to do just to keep going to the Illinois Institute of Technology, IIT (not to be confused with ITT). I can't bear to tell my mother that I don't think it is worth it at all. Man, college is nothing like it was protrayed to be. Why should people have to pay 100 grand + just for the privilege to be looked down upon by their professors and the school's administration, then just to be forced to learn everything on their own? I guess my still juvenile mind just doesn't comprehend how people don't understand how irrational our 'rational' civilization is...

The Beginning continues...

Today was a waste of a day. I didn't do too much of anything. Before the summer ends I want to finish with the new templates for JFAS. JFAS stands for the Japanese Film and Animation Society, which is the anime student organization at the Illinois Institute of Technology. Currently I am the webmaster. I need to do a complete overhaul of the site sometime this summer, then submit it to the president for approval. I have three months to do it... a lot of time to wait to the last minute. I will try my hardest not to go back to the procrastination philosophy that I usually prescribe to again. It really doesn't help in the end. Anyway, I have a lot of programming projects I want to start. I don't know if I can acutally do them, but hey, I don't have a summer job yet and I really am getting tired of sitting here doing nothing. Here's to good programming...

The Beginning...

Today, I establish myself as the idiot savant I am. I looked at my grades for my fourth semester of college. I am a mere shadow of my former self... but all and all, I am better off. I have to keep going... Unfortunately having bad grades doesn't forfeit your life. That would save me a lot of decision making. God, I wish I didn't have to do so much decision making.